A cross purpose is a physical or mental block you that keeps you from realizing your goals and dreams. Cross purposes are quirky little habits that are sometimes funny once encountered, but sometimes they can inspire pain and guilt instead of giggles. Cross purposes are secret sabotage plans you set out for yourself, pranks to your person that completely catch you off guard. 

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Maybe you anger over how rude your kids treat you even though you treat them with love and respect, only to find yourself rolling your eyes and "uh-huhing" your mom while talking to her on the phone. Maybe you made a commitment to exercise, signed yourself up for the gym, and even meal prepped; but you decided NOT to buy appropriate footwear, and now every time you walk, its punishment for your feet, legs, and hips. Do you eat hamburgers while talking about your next diet?  Contacting an ex to tell them that you are through with them is also a silly little cross purpose. Opening up a savings account with a monthly fee even though you live paycheck to paycheck, pay more attention!

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These metaphysical oxymorons go a little deeper than silly humanness. You are slowing and blocking your growth with these actions. You can stop, you just have to recognize what you are doing. Take something that you feel held back by and ask it questions. One customer of mine, could not get over her ex. She had given it time, tried dating other people, diving into work projects, and exercising; but every once in a while, there he was, is her thoughts and dreams. She'd burned him in the purple bonfire, pictured him in a bubble to watch him float away, drawn him on a mental chalkboard and then erased him, but there they were, thoughts of him and his perfect shoulders. So we asked her higher self, why he was still here, and then we found him. He was in a department store credit card she had used to outfit herself for his sisters wedding. $15 a month payments for 5 more months? Get rid of it now! He was in her phone contacts, he popped up on her facebook feed, the dreamcatcher that was over her bed had been made by materials they collected over a romantic weekend. What was really going on here? 

The truth was that her heart wasn't really ready to let go. Her mind knew it was time to move on, but the heart needed her to dedicate a little more energy to the matter. We cleared her energy around never going anywhere fancy. We cleared him and countless other people from her contact list and cleared around losing all her friends because she had lost him. We also added to the dreamcatcher to reset its energy. She wasn't holding on to him at all? She was holding on to experiences of him which she had fooled herself into thinking were him. In her case, her cross purposes were showing her that she needed more dancing, and less mental clutter, and were showing up in the form of sexy shoulders on a man she used to date. 

Perhaps those shoes that pinch are trying to get you to find a more comfortable path in life. Perhaps your disorganization comes from you not living your purpose - so you sabotage yourself to pay attention. Whatever your cross purpose is find it and talk to it, you might be surprised at what you find. 

 


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    Metzli is an intuitive tarot reader. She practices through her Etsy Shop.

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